10 Ways Flossing Is Like F$%&ing

 1. Deny all you want, but if you don’t do it there’s a build up of toxicity that erodes you in horrible, silent ways. 

2. While many don’t talk of it in polite company, most people are doing it (though normally children don’t want to.)

3. Preferences are important- you can be a string or tape person and never the twain shall meet. (Pick users are deviant.)

4. When you first start doing it it hurts (there’s blood!) but after you’ve done it a lot it becomes quite pleasurable. 

5. No matter how many professionals tell you it’s healthy and you need it, you have to want to do it for yourself. 

6. It’s essential as food and water; sometimes you have to get over your reticence and do it as an act of wild self-care. 

7. Some people like doing it everywhere, even in public (those pervs.) Others prefer the comfort and privacy of one wet location. (Bonus: you can do it alone!) 

8. When you lie down in a vulnerable position, and someone gets in your mouth and orders you to do something, you’re more likely to comply. 

9. So many ways to do it and yet everyone’s an expert! 

10. You can convince yourself it’s okay to skip it, but the truth is if you do eventually catastrophic things happen. Save yourself the aggravation and get flossing today! 

 

2 comments

  1. I like flossing twice a day, or even after after meal…! Really sucks though to run out of floss…that’s not only a little disastrous but also time consuming: go to the store, pick the right one (so many options, tape string and picks and the different colors too..!) and eventually make the purchase. Phew. Maybe Costco sells floss in bulk, one would rarely ever run out…brilliant! ;/). Xo

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